Revivalution Podcast

#27 - Heading Home

I have not written anything for a while. Not only that but I’ve not studied anything for a while, I have struggled, a great struggle to pray for such a long time. I start to pray and then my mind wanders away. It does it as if sneaking off out of a crowd and where it goes I never know.  It’s almost as though one wakes up and thinks “How did I get here”. You don’t remember the journey or even leaving to travel somewhere, You just know that you were at one place and now several hours later you are at another. Then you remember you were praying for seconds and somehow you left the secret place and ended up going through a large portion of your day not even realizing you left the other.  It’s crazy hard to explain, but it is so different from anything I have ever experienced before. I’ve not written anything because there is nothing to write, there has been no study and no listening, just wandering, aimlessly wandering. 
 
During these times you take inventory of your life. You look to see where it came off the rails. Where you got off track. You try and look back up the path from the place you have just come and you can’t look back far enough to see where the diversion took place. It must have been just over the horizon. But here is the real issue, it’s in the fact that you can’t go back. The path is time and time you have but once. It’s impossible to return. 
 
So what now... I sit here thinking it through. Can I even remember how I got here?  It’s so unclear, like a dream.  Did it really happen? So I think back to a vague feeling a reference, a call to repent. Did I repent?  I did not. I gave lip service, I gave some things, but I did not lay it all down.  Why didn’t I lay it all down and turn around?  It was because I’ve done it so many times before. Always returning to my vomit and lapping it up like it is a delicacy. I’m tired of failing You Father... I’m great at turning over a new leaf and yet the slightest wind of indifference will come along and flip me back to my original state.  And then there I am again, just the same old person, living life like everyone else who denies You.   
 
I was struck by this scripture this morning.  It’s the last verse in John 7, and it pops up out of the blue, v. 53 “And everyone went to his own house.”
 
I think about this scripture this morning... It’s pulling me in several directions, but ultimately it leads to one place.. my house.  At the end of John Chapter 7, you have the Sadducees and Pharisees, discussing Jesus together in a meeting, another “what are we going to do about this man” meeting that is. Many of them believe He is leading the house of Israel away from God, and they are already looking to destroy Him. These are the ones that should be leading the people of Isreal to God and yet they are leading them away, practically screaming “Don’t follow Him.”  What is it that would cause this?  It’s a lack of relationship. I believe fully in the counsel of others, but ultimately, we are responsible for ourselves. We’ve sought out counsel, which is the easy part, but then it’s time to go home. If you have received bad counsel, you have to go home with that and work it out. Many of those men in that assembly walked home that night, alone with their thoughts and the voice of God screaming inside of them, “This is the way,” and they denied it. Yet there were a few like Nicodemus, who longed for the truth, who went home with a heart that said whatever You want it’s Yours. Ultimately when we stand before God we will each stand before Him alone. We will not have our counselors, will not have our Spouse, our children, or even a close friend, and we each will have to account for what we did with Him. To be clearer, what we did with Jesus?  Take that to your home, work it out now, you and God, and whatever He asks for give it to Him. 
 
God reveals Himself to those who want Him.  The beautiful story of Simeon in Luke Chapter 2.  It’s ten verses of what it looks like to both seek and find Him.  I long to have a heart like Simeon’s, it wasn’t about greatness or promotion, it was about one thing, finding Jesus. 
 
Father, I come to You with great lack. I ask You to know my heart, and if it is off, I place it in Your hands to heal it. And if it is broken beyond repair, I ask You to create in me a new one. I fear that it is broken beyond repair, which makes me so thankful that You are the creator, but more than that... You are the lover of my soul. I’m so tired of the distance, I miss You so much. I’m home, alone, and I invite You into this most intimate place, where it is just me with You. Speak to me, counsel me, love on me, take me.
 
In Jesus name,
Amen

#26 Revivalution PrayerCast - Thankful

Father,
 
I just ended a busy weekend, one where I started off Saturday morning in prayer and once again starting to feel Your presence, and yet I ended with business, forgetfulness and separation.  I come to You this morning and the distance is palpable.  It is evident, I lived for myself and not for You.  Filling myself up with my own desires and not filling my great need for You, with Your presence.  Will I ever make it through this? Will I move forward from this place, this dry and barren land into a land that is refreshing flowing with all that You are.  A land where the ground has been tilled and prepared for the rain that only You can bring? Or will I stay in a place where the land is hard, where the work to prepare for You is too much?  The lands are the same place. It’s not moving from one land to another land. The land or the life I’ve be given is not in multiples, it is one. I have to prepare this place for You. One thing I think I used to know was Your holiness, now I don’t see it so clearly. The magnificence, the majesty, the greatness, the HOLINESS of You. In exchange for the perfectness of You I’ve allowed my life to feast on unholy things knowing that You can’t dwell in a place that is filled with the filth of this world. Father take my life, and put inside of me a desire for You that causes me to do the hard work of preparing a place for You. Starting is hard, but once I put my hand to the plow to break up this fallow ground, that’s when You show up, softly at first, placing your hands on mine, gently leading me through the process. Then strength comes and lack of desire turns into a flame. As the plow of Your spirit bites into the old crusty, nasty, dusty land of my heart, You take something that looks worthless, but it’s there just below the surface where there is fertile soil.  Nothing is wasted, even the dry crusty soil is turned into the soil and becomes useful. Wasted days, weeks and years still have a purpose, You still find them useful, nothing is beyond your restoration. It’s here in a prepared place that You can plant the seeds of who You are, the seeds of Your presence, the seeds of Your promise, and roll them into the fertile soil. My work is to prepare a place, but the rest thankfully is You.  But then You bring the rain, that’s when heaven falls and mixes with the soil of my life, and the seeds that You have provided, that’s when I’m refreshed and I can become fruitful. I’ve lived in confusion at times.  I see how much You do in the process of bringing me to You. It’s pretty much everything, but I’m not without responsibility. I have the responsibility of preparing a place for You. It’s here that I fill the fear creep in. I know all of my failings, all of my beginnings and then my ultimate failure.  Jesus I need You. It’s here that I simply have to stop and say thank You for loving me.  Where I realize that we are never too far gone. You shaped this world that each of us can know You, giving Your life as a ransom for us. Thank You that it doesn’t matter how many failures, how many starts and stops, You continue to pursue, not willing that one should perish. Father, Son and Holy Spirit, help me to love You and not just be loved by You. Love You completely in my pursuit and preparation for You, preparing a heart that you can pour all of Yourself on holding nothing back. 
 
In Jesus Name I Pray, Amen. 

#25 Revivalution PrayerCast - Distance

Revivalution Podcast Episode #24 A Prayer for a Right Mind Please Subscribe to the Revivalution Podcast: Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/.../revivalution.../id1716429308 Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/5TUukPj8PEcdmjp2WYWtBd Google Podcast: https://podcasts.google.com/.../aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkLnBvZGJlY... iHeart Podcast: https://iheart.com/podcast/130797198 TuneIn Podcast: https://tunein.com/.../Rel.../Revivalution-Podcast-p3914566/ Also available on several other podcast services, search your preferred platform for Revivalution Podcast.
 
Father,
I just ended a busy weekend, one where I started off Saturday morning in prayer and once again starting to feel Your presence, and yet I ended with business, forgetfulness and separation. I come to You this morning and the distance is palpable. It is evident, I lived for myself and not for You. Filling myself up with my own desires and not filling my great need for You, with Your presence. Will I ever make it through this? Will I move forward from this place, this dry and barren land into a land that is refreshing flowing with all that You are. A land where the ground has been tilled and prepared for the rain that only You can bring? Or will I stay in a place where the land is hard, where the work to prepare for You is too much? The lands are the same place. It’s not moving from one land to another land. The land or the life I’ve be given is not in multiples, it is one. I have to prepare this place for You. One thing I think I used to know was Your holiness, now I don’t see it so clearly. The magnificence, the majesty, the greatness, the HOLINESS of You. In exchange for the perfectness of You I’ve allowed my life to feast on unholy things knowing that You can’t dwell in a place that is filled with the filth of this world. Father take my life, and put inside of me a desire for You that causes me to do the hard work of preparing a place for You. Starting is hard, but once I put my hand to the plow to break up this fallow ground, that’s when You show up, softly at first, placing your hands on mine, gently leading me through the process. Then strength comes and lack of desire turns into a flame. As the plow of Your spirit bites into the old crusty, nasty, dusty land of my heart, You take something that looks worthless, but it’s there just below the surface where there is fertile soil. Nothing is wasted, even the dry crusty soil is turned into the soil and becomes useful. Wasted days, weeks and years still have a purpose, You still find them useful, nothing is beyond your restoration. It’s here in a prepared place that You can plant the seeds of who You are, the seeds of Your presence, the seeds of Your promise, and roll them into the fertile soil. My work is to prepare a place, but the rest thankfully is You. But then You bring the rain, that’s when heaven falls and mixes with the soil of my life, and the seeds that You have provided, that’s when I’m refreshed and I can become fruitful. I’ve lived in confusion at times. I see how much You do in the process of bringing me to You. It’s pretty much everything, but I’m not without responsibility. I have the responsibility of preparing a place for You. It’s here that I fill the fear creep in. I know all of my failings, all of my beginnings and then my ultimate failure. Jesus I need You. It’s here that I simply have to stop and say thank You for loving me. Where I realize that we are never too far gone. You shaped this world that each of us can know You, giving Your life as a ransom for us. Thank You that it doesn’t matter how many failures, how many starts and stops, You continue to pursue, not willing that one should perish. Father, Son and Holy Spirit, help me to love You and not just be loved by You. Love You completely in my pursuit and preparation for You, preparing a heart that you can pour all of Yourself on holding nothing back.
In Jesus Name I Pray, Amen

#24 Prayer for a Right Mind

Father,
 
You know me.  My inmost being, you know how my thoughts betray the greatness of who You are. How I see myself as so much less than anything you ever meant me to be.  I watched the Coffee Bean the other day and was struck how someone told him he had thinking stinking, and how he was able to change in the worst situation. I see that so much in myself. Feelings and thoughts of defeat. How it seems that I can’t win, or at least that is how it is in my mind. Even though I look back on every moment of my life and see Your hand and Your guiding, and Your protection through all of it.  How You have held me and loved me completely through it all, and yet in my mind, I’m loser and a failure. Father it’s more than having a good attitude, it’s about not looking at the price You paid for me, and Your great love for me, and how valuable I am to you and thinking that it is worthless.  The valuable price You paid for me, the patience and the love You have for me. Father, It’s time for me to embrace Your thoughts towards me.  
 
In Jeremiah Your thoughts toward me are Good  and full of hope for my future. In Psalms The sheer number and preciousness of Your thoughts toward me lets me know that You never stop thinking of me.  In Isaiah You love me so greatly that You thoughts for me are beyond my understanding, and are filled with divine wisdom and care for me.  In Zephaniah, You say that Your Rebuke is not forever but it is filled with Great Love and kindness.  You take Joy in me, rejoicing over me, singing Your love for me.
 
So today, I rebuke any thought that I’ve allowed to take hold in me that says anything less than being Your precious, and loved child. That You have made me not only an over comer, but a member of Your family. I thank You that the thoughts of less than no longer have fertile soil, that those seeds are choked out by the truth of who You are, and that where there have been thoughts of only losing to the truth that I can’t lose. I thank You for the deeper waters of Your presence and Your love. I thank You for drowning me in Your Great love.  It’s my joy to give it all to You. Whisper to me all day long and every moment from this day forward the truth of who I am in You. The fact that I am simply Yours. Thank You that the people that You have placed in my life are blessed today because I belong to You and I bring You into every situation.  
 
I love You, increase my capacity to love You and to be loved by You. 
 
In Jesus Name, 
 
~amen

#23 The Tug of a Million Horses

There is this struggle inside of me... One where there is frustration... One where I feel like I am floundering, with life and purpose.  There is confusion as well. “Am I where I’m supposed to be? Am I doing what I’m supposed to be doing?”  Time is ticking... 
 
There is a pull... a tugging at my heart towards Him.  It is more powerful than a tug, it is like a hook that reaches down to the deepest part of me and painfully pulls with the strength of a million horses at the center of my being. It is a longing. This longing describes the desire, but it doesn’t describe the confusion in how to satisfy it. What do I do? How do I satisfy this fire inside of me that burns to be with Him? To be in His presence, to commune with Him, speak with Him, hear His voice, live in the fullness of all He is. Anything else will simply not do, yet making the move towards that almost seems impossible. Is this what Paul felt like, when he penned this, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”  Romans 7:15. It seems I do the things that would take me further away from that longing instead of closer to it.  Really it is simple to satisfy this longing, but it is also telling of where my heart, or our hearts are. Here is the simplicity it’s found in Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.”
 
Here is a picture of where I’m at. Imagine a day in August in the Southeast United States, It’s hot and the humidity is near 100%. You’ve been working out in the sun and now you find yourself standing next to a pool. The water sparkles, it’s crisp, it’s clean and you know it is cool and it is going to feel amazing to jump in. Yet the first few seconds of that immersion are going to be painful as your body adapts to the abrupt and sudden vast change of temperature.  It is going to be shocking. As you stand there for several moments, making the move to jump in but just before you do you pull up, the change is going to be too much.  You question yourself... Is it worth it? 
 
Now let’s bring this back to something much greater, much more powerful, much more shocking to our spirits. Every one of us has this longing, it is an innate desire to be fully immersed in Him. But here is this drawback, it’s going to be so shocking to everything we are: spirit, soul, and body.  Here is what I need to satisfy this longing, the place where the tug of the horses is pulling me.  It’s where John found himself standing on that day in Revelation 1:10, I imagine he was searching for Him with all of his heart when Jesus showed up in Revelation 1:17.  And when Jesus showed up John fell at His feet as dead. 
 
There is this place that I know I’m headed and I have to be honest it scares me. For me there is so much unknown about it, yet all of it seems perfectly familiar. I find myself pulling back, about to jump yet holding up. But the tug... It’s too powerful... It’s almost as if it is dragging me in. It’s His love for me, it won’t let me be denied Him, but as much as I want to be with Him, it is infinitely more precious to Him to be with me.  Gently He pulls but it doesn’t feel that way. I look behind me, I can see the ruts that my heels have made in the soil as I’ve tried to dig in and hold my ground.  I long for what’s ahead, I long for all that is there, why can’t I simply give in and dive head-first into all of Him?  
 
At first, what happened to John doesn’t sound pleasant. There is no greater image of what it means to be undone than He describes. Dead. All of the things I hold to are folly, compared to being with Him. Yet I dig in. It’s not even that I don’t want to give them up because I don’t want any separation.  
 
This place where I’m headed... it seems crazy that I or anyone else who has this longing would fight against it. For we are fighting for petty things, exchanging them for the perfect things our hearts long for.  That moment is going to be sin-killing shocking, when finally the tug has pulled me so close that I have no choice but to give in and fall into His presence, fully dying to this world.  Yes there will be that painful moment of death, but then there is the rest of the scripture in Revelation 1:17.  “I fell at His feet as dead. But He laid His right hand on me, saying to me, “Do not be afraid; I am the First and the Last.” 
 
Now alive our purposes are renewed, forever we have been going to the pool with buckets that have no bottoms, dipping them into the pool and drawing them out empty, and then trying to minister to those who need Him with empty, bottomless buckets. But God’s intention is that we not use buckets, because we are the buckets. I believe it is His intention to use us, living in Him, in this place of the perfectness that all He is, and minister from that place. Maybe he allows us to be one of the horses pulling on the ropes that are hooked to the deepest parts of others to tug them just a little closer to Him, until finally they choose to fall in. 

#22 Proof that God loves me

Proof that God loves me...
I used to strive to find God’s love. Working hard to earn it, looking for it everywhere until the miracle of the revelation that He truly does love me.  What an incredible thing to finally know after so many years.  Now wherever I look I find it.  As a matter of fact I found it this morning while celebrating Dawn’s birthday.  You my love are proof that God loves me. 
 
Proverbs 18:22 (AMP)
He who finds a [true and faithful] wife finds a good thing and obtains favor and approval from the LORD. 
 
Steven Curtis Chapman has a song I love about the day his wife was born called 11-6-64.  It’s all about that one day in  his life on the day she was born.  For me part of the song would read this way.  “And I was only 4 years old, So really, I don’t know what was going on. But I, I bet I laughed and played harder on that day ‘Cause my whole world was changing on 7-6-71”
 
To my love... You are proof of how valuable I am to our Heavenly Father, to be given someone so completely wonderful, so fully loving and lovable, someone who completes me in every way. You are my gift and I can guarantee on the day and moment you were born, joy filled my four year old heart and I laughed for some unknown reason in the moment, because the gift of you was given to me on that day. 
 
Father, thank you for everything, every joy reveals who You are. The struggles in life only prove your faithfulness, and the gifts you give are so perfect.  I thank you today for my bride, she is a gift to me that proves to me how truly valuable I am to You. To be given someone so amazing to walk through life with lets me know that you must really think a lot about me.  :) I love you Father.  Lead us through this day and help me to let you love someone through me.  ~amen. 

#21 Signs & Wonders

Yesterday I had the opportunity to sit down with someone that I love.  As we sat there I shared with him the greatest of all miracles that we each get to experience as a Christian, a proof that God is real and active in our lives. It’s the greatest of the signs and wonders and for the most part it goes unnoticed in our lives. 
 
As Christian’s I believe we all have a desire to not only see true miracles but we also want to allow God to work miracles through us. I believe that this is a God given desire because we have been made in His image and it’s natural for us to want to reflect Him.  But today it’s not about that it’s about the greatest miracle of all. The miracle of salvation. Probably more than any other time in history there is a struggle in the mind.  Anxiety and depression are overwhelming us and it is leaving us hollow and feeling unloved as we struggle through the day to day of life.  For that reason Salvation to me is the greatest of all miracles and we have all experienced it. When we come to Christ and submit our lives to Him and ask Him to forgive us of our sins and receive that salvation, a verifiable miracle occurs. All of the things we have done wrong, all of the things that separate us from Him, all of the mental challenges are washed away.  We are made new, our minds are renewed, it’s instant.  There is a miracle that happens that a billion dollars of therapy can’t do. It’s the miracle of being made right with God, not because of something you did but because of everything that He did.  Think about it... How hard it is for people to get over mental issues, and yet God can come in and make the vilest clean, and they know it and they receive it? No therapy needed. That’s a miracle. But there is an enemy that comes in and immediately starts the work of accusing. So let me share this as a personal testimony of what God has for us.  
 
After the miracle of God’s love for me being revealed I had an encounter with the enemy.  Like he had done so many times before He came accusing me, it was like a movie of everything I had ever done wrong was playing out on a screen in front of me.  He wasn’t saying anything just the memories of all of my failures were flying through my mind and it was overwhelming. Then he whispered... “I know who you really are”.  I’m standing there literally feeling all of the emotions of every failure, it is being poured on me like hot lava, engraving itself back into my mind. It was at the moment, born out of the knowledge of God’s love and acceptance for me, that I whispered back, “Then you know who my Savior is...”  -And it stopped!  As a matter of fact to this day, I couldn’t tell you one thing out of the millions of things I was being accused of. It was gone. 
 
Father,
 
Thank You for loving on me today. Thank You for washing and making me clean. I’m already facing some things that if allowed them to would overwhelm me.  Most are self inflicted, so I’m so thankful for Your mercy, I’m so thankful for Your faithfulness, and I know I’ve already said it but I’m so thankful that You love me.  Thank you for the miracle of forgiveness, for the miracle of being made right before You. Thank You for leading me through this day and giving me favor and influence, thank You for meeting my needs today, and blessing those around me.  
 
I love you,
Stacy

#20 Humor Found in the Bible

Read this this morning and have to say it struck me as funny.  
 
John 7:1
After these things Jesus walked in Galilee; for He did not want to walk in Judea, because the Jews sought to kill Him.
 
I think maybe it could have been said that He did not want to run in Judea.  :)
 
Anyway, I love this scripture. Jesus knowing His purpose lived in the authority of it, and not the fear of it.  Finding your purpose and living in it will make you fearless.  
 
Father,
Thank you for the joy you bring and the purpose you have given me for this day.  May I live it to the fullest. Thank you for walking with me and planting my feet securely. 
I love you, 
Stacy

#19 "My Truth"

“My Truth”
 
It’s become a very popular statement here recently.  I watch as people formulate their Truth through life experiences. From brokenness they grab at little pieces of their lives, arrange them, trying to understand them, and then one day out of that hurt and brokenness, they have their eureka moment, and that turns into their truth. This truth is where they stand and it’s unchallengeable. They are saying to the world, “You are welcome to your truth, but this... this is mine, you can’t take it, you can’t change it, it’s my truth.”
 
John 17:17
“Sanctify them by Your truth...”
 
I’m struggling to write this morning.  I fear that my motivation for writing is becoming about me instead of hearing from the Father. Trying to put together something that will get a like or a share. Ughhh.  That’s not what it is about.  This world needs the love that I’ve been allowed to experience.  The love of an awesome Holy and Perfect God, that left heaven, became a man, lived a sinless life and then gave His life for me. And if that wasn’t enough, He stretched His muscles, rose from the dead and is now seated at the right hand of the Father, where He makes intercession for me.  
 
Father,
 
Thank you for Your truth, Your word is Truth. Thank You for helping me hide it deep in my heart. Thank You for sanctifying me through it. Change me Lord into Your image. Hide me in Your shadow.  Thank You for this day. Thank You for meeting my needs and the needs of Dawn, my children and my grandchildren. Thank You for your goodness and faithfulness.  You are so awesome.  You are so perfect.  Help me to allow myself to loved by You even more fully today, and allow me to love others today with all of the love that you have for me. So that they can experience the love You have for them. Go before me. Guide my steps and make me exactly what You long for me to be. 
 
I love you,
Stacy

#18 Conclusion

Around 1,000 B.C. Solomon penned the book of Ecclesiastes. It is presumed that he was in a backslidden condition.  In this condition and with all of his wisdom, he reasons with himself the plight of man and the utter fallacy of earthly sins, pleasures, and pursuits.  In 12 chapters he proves that the mind of man is the same 3,000 years later. We deal with the same things, the same people, the same desires. In two verses he sums it all up, and it is a truth that is written on all of our hearts. Ecclesiastes 12:13-14:
Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:Fear God and keep His commandments,
For this is man’s all. 
For God will bring every work into judgement, 
Including every secret thing,
Whether good or evil. 
 
In the day and time, we have been placed on the earth most men who are, living, breathing, working, eating, and sleeping, are also striving to silence the truth written on their hearts. We give to God the things that are easy for us to give him, but if we struggle with something, we call it “precious”, we call it “our truth”, we call it “mine”, and refuse to give it up. We believe God’s word and His love for us, as long as it doesn’t make us emotionally conflicted. We are not emotionally conflicted, we are sin-conflicted. There is a war going on for our souls, and many of us our waving the white flag of surrender to the enemy because we are tired of fighting for what is written on our hearts.  We strive for what is ours, we wear ourselves out holding to the things God longs to free us from. We turn from our sins and yet feed our sinful selves with the junk of this world, and then we wonder why we don’t hear His voice. You are what you eat. Quit dining at this world’s table and then complain to the Father about how fat you are with sinful desires.   
 
Each of us from the most godly among us to the most agnostic, knows that our day is coming. It is written deep inside of us, it is a surety.  “Every secret thing, Whether good or evil,” will be judged. 
 
Father,
 
I feel a long way off today. Some may feel that what I’ve written today is in judgment of them, and not filled with love. You know my heart.  I’m not writing to anyone. This is what I see in myself, I’m passively sitting at the world’s table and feeding myself garbage and then I complain to You about how hard the fight is. It’s time to change seats. It’s time to get up from this table and come to the table of your presence and dine.  Thank you for this word today. You spoke quietly to my heart and then revealed to me a path to freedom. Set my heart, set our hearts afire for You. Feel us with all that You are. Make us strong in Your presence and send us into the fields filled up and overflowing with Your love, Your power, and Your freedom, onto the world around us. 
 
Thank you for going before me today and speaking to me all day long. You are everything.
 
I love you,
~Stacy